Gilded Latten Bones - Witicisms from TunFaire

I have to admit it. I have discovered Steam Punk fiction. Unfortunately the genre often contains chamber pots. I still prefer urban fantasy for its cars and indoor plumbing but these books do rock. Detectives and the mysteries that follow them, I seem to love where ever they are.


I have two steam punk series that I devour whenever new books hit my library. I adore the Parasol Protectorate by Gail Carriger.; I own a few of her books. I follow Garrett PI when Glen Cook records his cases.

Today I will write about Garrett. Garrett is a private investigator, former marine living in the fantasy world of TunFaire along with elves, trolls, dwarves, minor gods, and vampires.
From the book jacket

For Garrett, P.I., loyalty and love come a close second to survival...

Garrett's attempt at domestic bliss with the fiery Tinnie Tate is sidetracked when he waylays a pair of home intruders and learns they've been paid by an unknown source to kidnap Tinnie. But as Garrett rushes to find out who is trying to push his buttons, his best friend is attacked. Now, Garrett has to track down both malefactors.

Unless they're really one and the same-in which case Garrett might be next...

Our retired hero is keeping house with his number one squeeze Tinnie Tate. He is getting a little pudgy around the middle and people have started ignore him. Garrett finds being ignored quite uncomfortable.  Despite this, our Garrett has created a boring existence far from the excitement found on Macunado Street until someone tries to kidnap Tinnie and murder his best pal Morely. Garrett returns to his detective and body-guarding past to solve the mystery. During the intriguing yet meandering story, Garrett makes new friends, finds old enemies and catches both a cold and the heart of a fearsome sorceress. Nice job!

I like Garret and Glen Cook. His characters have plain speak. No flowers, no silly analogies. Garrett is just a man who likes his beer and chamber pot nearby. His partner, the Dead Man, is a genius spirit who doesn't have to deal with the awkwardness of personal relationships.
Garrett doesn't have to pound the pavement in this story. Most of the action seems to either gravitate toward him or is reported to him. It gives a new meaning to being cooped up. Good thing Garrett has the sorceress, the stable manager, the restaurateur, the tracker, the beer deliveries, and night time flying to keep him busy.

When reading Gilded Latten Bones the reader is privy to the witticisms of our first-person protagonist. I have gathered a few for you.

Garret On Paranoia

I say that when you stop believing in weird conspiracies that involve scores of people who never break faith, you're fully ripe for the weird to come get you.

Garrett on MILFs with hot daughters

When I knew her Kevans had been pretending to be a boy. If she took after her mom she could make that leather smolder. Taking a wild shot a making Strafa feel better because her kid was weirdly built was one of those special moments that make me uniquely me.

Garrett On the opposite sex

A desirable woman who catches a man in bed in the middle of the night won't need to work hard to have her way.

Garrett On being underestimated

Someday I'll make a huge score because nobody will take me at face value. I could loot the Royal Mint, then run around yelling about how it was me that done it.

Garrett on the public's fascination with celebrities

And there was another reason Jon Salvation felt free to unleash his inner dick. People put up with it because he might cast them in a play.

As you can see Garrett's character has many, many fine points. This book is good for the first time reader and fans of the series. I encourage you to read it since it is packed with interesting characters and plot points for future exploration.

My score B+

Wicked City - WTFery?

I have been wanting to read this book since I learned of it a few years back. In the 90s I watched an anime titled Wicked City. I loved it. It was strange but the entertaining. I was curious about the light novel upon which it was based.  I have it now. And here is the review.

Taki, our hero is a fabulous guy with a fabulous life.
He works for the sooper sekrit  Black Guardand an ordinary electronic company. He has two bosses but they occupy the same office so he doesn't have to make two trips. As a Black Guard he protects mankind from malevolent demons using highly developed psychic powers.
He is so fabulous, that he is given the once in a lifetime opportunity to escort the famous Guiseppe Mayart, a lecherous hermit. The upcoming Peace Treaty signing requires Mayart's presence. Teamed with Maki, a Black Guard from the demon side, they traverse Tokyo communities, bars, parks, subways, streets, and strip clubs  with Mayart in tow. Often dragging him out of dangerous locations and away from murderous demons who want to make meals out of humans not peace.

We learn about the demons through Taki's first person narration.  It seems that our mythology has been an attempt by our human minds to frame demon interactions. For example, centaurs, the Minotaur and Kirin were all demons. From the demons, humans learned magic and gained power from us the demons ate well or emigrated to our land. Throughout the ages treaties have ensured peace and emigration but to keep all the players in line the Black Guard was formed.
In some ways the book is full of ludicrous examples of perversion and misogyny. There are some scenes in the book that make it not appropriate for younger readers.
Black out inducing orgasms. Soul absorbing demons. Rape. Vagina Dentata like you have never seen.  Mayarts overt desire to have sex with everyone he meets  and in every place he enters. And finally, Taki's inexplicable sexual desire for Maki during horrific events would confuse a younger reader. At least it should certainly disturb one. 

The novel was written in the 1980s. I had to keep that in mind while I read it. Today, I would expect more gratuitous sex and unnecessary violence.  More kick-assness from the female lead and a more conspiracy laden back story for the Black Guard. It is a quick read,  even with the WTF moments.
I give it a C+